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4 Helpful Tips to Make the Most out of Date Night When your Man is Being a Jerk

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You are no doubt aware of the seemingly endless benefits that Date Night will have on your relationship.  It seems I can’t read an article or open a magazine that doesn’t tout this as a mysterious cure all for the busy modern couple to, once and for all, get reconnected.

Having Relationship Problems?

So what if you and your man haven’t exactly been seeing eye to eye, maybe you are both dodging verbal blows or avoiding eye contact altogether while you lick your proverbial wounds.

You figure you’ll skip the whole date night thing until “things get better” between the two of you.  And you know what, I get where you’re coming from.  Who wants to spend quality alone time with the jerk who has been driving you nuts lately?

Mend Your Broken Relationship

Here’s the thing… I know you don’t feel like it, but this is actually the perfect time to put a few date nights on the calendar and stick to them, no matter the condition your love life is in.  Call a truce and let bygones be bygones.  Just for a few hours, I promise.

By interrupting your habitual patterns of fighting and then sulking in your respective corners, or numbing with food/ drink, you are actually forming new brain circuitry.  That, over time, will help you to ease over the bumps your relationship is bound to encounter.

Make Each Other a Priority

You might have to fake it till you make it.  But putting in the time by making each other a priority and holding the simple intention of enjoying each other’s company usually leads to a more satisfying love life.   Think of each Date Night as a stepping stone on the road to building the relationship you want.

Here are four Date Night ideas so you can survive when you’re at odds with your man.

1. Date Night is not a destination!!   It’s about an intention and the tone you set.  Start small with low key, low commitment activities.

2. Get clear on why you’re doing this (you’re sick of fighting, you like having fun and you used to love having a good time with him…)

3. Allow your self to see his good side and let your best self show up.  If it feels right, pay him a heartfelt compliment.

4. Do Not talk about chores, any kind of To-Do lists, Bills, Kids or Pets are all off limits.  I realize that this will be a challenge in the beginning, it’s important to notice how we fall into habitual patterns even in our conversations.  Changing the way you and your man communicate and interact is the first step in changing the whole relationship.

All my best,
Heather Baker

 

 

About the Author

Heather BakerHeather Baker is a Relationship Coach, certified from the prestigious, world-class Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC). She specializes in saving relationships from a break up or divorce. In addition to being a relationship coach, Heather’s a devout student and teacher of yogic and Buddhist philosophy. Heather lives in San Francisco, California with her fiancée and their two rescue pups, Miso and Minka.View all posts by Heather Baker →

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